< 130 > Misteri sebuah Misery

WHEN YOU CAN'T PLAY IT HARD,PLAY IT SMART

I had been dreaming of becoming thinner. Or maybe what I should say was appear to be thinner.Notice the bold,as they carry two different meanings.Dig in deeper=)

Ever since I reached puberty,this whole idea of looking great came from hours of pages-flipping through magazines and..magazines. Back then,they were REMAJA or SEVENTEEN [or MARIE CLAIRE sometimes,when money wasn't a big issue of the month] and I got hooked up.Carrying it everywhere and spent another hours imagining myself being as skinny as the models.What a loser me to let those years slipped unproductively.

But as day passes,I realized that I'm tired of envying that hour-glass shape.

thinking of getting the same shape as the vase,huh?

I did better go and hit some walls than to keep my hunger for that 36-24-36 stats.

err..TOINK!some people are just too innocent to grab the truth beneath a sarcasm

I was an anorexic once,and I don't say that with proud.Nor I feel shame to admit it.That was one,from those long list of stupidest and craziest moves I've ever taken.Well,that's life.Everyone lives to learn but not all succeed in becoming a mature adult.I've learnt my lesson,though it was in a pretty harsh way.The condition was so bad that a friend used to say that she can even hit some keys and play a song from my piano-like chest.LOL![too bad you don't do medic babe,or else you would have known the different sound your chest will give through percussion&auscultation(*-*)GOOD LUCK to you and your bacteria friends anyway=p]

I wished I could just ignore those mischievous boys who kept teasing me with those ayam katik,itik,bumper and JB nicknames every time I passed.I wished I realized that everyone is special in her own way,earlier.I wished that I loved myself as much as I'm loving it her right now.Because it has been 9 years of blurry vision.I have suffered.Been in misery.While I actually can get rid of it easily.

If I'm being too conscious with those pesters,I'll end up taking thousand pictures like this--->

or going on with refusal to take food--->

when I will be a lot happier if I choose to

continue eating joyfully

put up that stunning smile on face

and do HO-LA-HOOP once in a while!

or simply hide behind someone whenever a picture is captured!

SMART MIND HUH?

[the last 4 pictures were taken during Brut&Muna's open house]